- i gather your need like stones from a dry riverbed.
- falling for an idea, or collection of light
- “before language”
- a gathering of speed
- fertile time.. fertile periods of time.
- the immensity of knowing you could ask anything and get a yes. the void where your desire was moments ago.
- death and the lady.
- sleeper car no one belongs here
- the narrative becoming universal rather than specific. specificity is the result of the audience meeting the lines and bringing them true to themselves (rather than the author).
- i flip through other people’s photos and see myself in them, then flip back and i’ve moved on.
- the old pay for their triumphs with broken hips and irrelevance.
- the breaking of the ring. the curse.
- talisman. bobbles. protection/curse. symbology of fear.
- a man so like coramac mccarthy riding the most run down bus in calgary.
- sharp woody smell of cotton balls. a smell memory almost dead. the old man struggles against his overcoat. is he native or aisan. he stares at the young native girl like she’s dinner. blue suit with tight grey pin stripes. his hair comes mussed from the staring and fighting the coat. tustled. he never quite achieves the poise his suit, or age, demands of him. are all those wrinkly lines and unpacked suits on their way to send off some passed lover?
- learning to tell the right lies can make all the difference.
- miranda july. great.
- learning to let the questions go unanswered.
- what if liminality was exactly equal to the point of exquisite pain?
- being less judgemental. less shaping things. less forcing and controlling things.
- the curve poem.
- reciprocity
- rosary..
- six stella artois. seven if you are serious. never more.
- tattoo.. came so far..
- types: one lock, unlocks everything, one lock unlocks another lock. this can repeat forever (m.)
- the cabbie telling me not to for a second “trusting anyone with tha heart”
- it’s complicated.
- glowing shift of focus, internal. luminous.
- a levee to the heart?
-ralph gibson is the father, the son. the holy photographer.
-multi-flash night photos in the woods.
-strange elation of getting what you need, even if you don’t really want it. Reluctant joy?
-asked who influenced you now, ralph gibson replies “the truth is in my case i believe i need to be as cultured as i can possibly make myself.”
-related, he also finds chiaroscuro as a strong base.
-semiology - the study of sign, signification and communication
-black and white for concentration of form and tone.
-talking too much always gets you in the shit. how many times can we repeat the same mistakes?
-” but i feel when i look at the pictures, they are pretty, but it mostly ends there for me.”
-limen // In physiology, psychology, or psychophysics, a limen or a liminal point is a threshold of a physiological or psychological response. the smallest detectable sensation
-she ran away from love.
-skeins of light (jude)
-brass bullet casings dusted grey with exploded lead, the threat of death spent.
-the need for more time to allow method and observation into the routine. pushing out distraction and obligation to find dwelling time. quiet methodical thinking time. experiencing time.
-“and the truth of it is i wonder i’m beautiful enough for you.” hawksley workman - september lily
4 x 30 = 120 x 12 = 1440. hmm. math only makes it look worse.
-on how going without starts out bitter and angry, turns pure and clear and heightens your experience. want become focusing crystal.
-related how the ultimate realization time and time again is how little you really need to get on.
-on feeling less than because you don’t have, in comparision.
-on the strange sadness of not being able to make a nice dinner for daja.
—-
no matter how long between
when the darkness comes
we forget the light
and all that lived in it.
